So, if you're looking for my GUTGAA Meet-and-Greet post, click here! Or scroll down.
If you would like to read about my writing insecurities, you've come to the right post! I found this through a couple of writing friends, and I think it will be a good thing to do every month, just to kind of get it all out there.
My first post is going to be about rejection.
When I finished my first MS, I thought I was ready for everything. I had a few friends read it, made some edits off of their suggestions, got that "you're not crazy" seal of approval, and started researching agents, the query process, and everything that comes with it. I was excited, I was confident, I was...completely naive.
That's right, friends, I crashed and burned. I didn't even make it past the query round. And for a little while, I was kinda bummed about it. No, scratch that. I was devastated.
I didn't think I was good enough - and I think that, at the time I queried, I definitely wasn't good enough. And I don't think I'm even good enough now - but I'm getting there.
When I had my query fail, I started to question everything. Was I really a writer? Was I a decent writer? Were my friends lying to me when they said I had a good story?
Rejection opened the door for self-doubt. And it was a door that would have stayed open, if not for my new WIP.
I think the story I'm working on now has potential that my first novel never did. I am excited about it, but there's always that nagging fear in the back of my mind.
What if I write the best story that I can, but in the end it's still not good enough?
This time I'm approaching things differently. I've gotten a few awesome critique partners, am really thinking things through, and have come up with an idea that is way better than anything I'd thought of before. I am slowly rebuilding the confidence that I lost, but I think I'll always carry that first lesson with me.
So I guess I kind of lied at the beginning of this post. It is about rejection. But it's also about hope, determination, and, most of all, love. I love to write, and I am determined to keep doing it, even if it doesn't inevitably lead to more rejections.
Because, at the end of the day, all I need is one yes.
Well hello! Just hopping over from IWSG:-) Welcome! I checked out your About Me page and thought you were very entertaining. I'm obsessed with The Fringe and pretty much anthing JJ Abrams slaps his name on. So I think I'd love your novel! I'll be back . . . Cheers!
ReplyDeleteAww thank you! I try to entertain :)
DeleteAnd I love to meet fellow Fringe fans! I also second the JJ Abrams statement!
I'm glad that you'll come and visit again!
Have a good one!
Glad you came back to writing, despite the disappointment! The first novel wasn't useless if it helps you write your next one better. I am also a Fringe fan. I also love Joss Whedon (especially Firefly). I am also working on a YA sci-fi. Here's to common ground :)
ReplyDeleteAllison (Geek Banter)
There was definitely a bit of a rough spot, but you're totally right - my first novel has definitely helped me write the next one! Now I feel more confident that I can do it again, and that I can be better :)
DeleteAlso, our common ground is awesome!
Another Fringe fan here.
ReplyDeleteI think everyone goes through the same rough spot at the beginning. It's hard to know how much you don't know. That's what CPs are for. But never totally lose the doubt about your writing. It will keep you sharp and motivated to keep learning.
Welcome to IWSG.
Thanks for the advice/welcome, Ken! I appreciate it!
DeleteWow. I totally related to everything you said. I had a similar experience with the difference that I still really believe in my first manuscript. At some point I'll go back and revise. In the meantime, I'm keeping my fingers crossed that the new book works out. I'm right on the edge of querying now, which is extremely daunting after the first time.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, I'm from GUTGAA too. I was so inspired by all the great blogs that I finally started my own. I'd love it if you'd stop by. It's www.onemagicbeanbuyer.blogspot.com I'm kind of in desperate need of followers. haha.
Good luck with GUTGAA. Nice to meet you!
Yeah, my crash-and-burn moment (or month, really) was no fun. But I bounced back and am ready to make this book awesome :) I hope your second book works out for you! It was really hard for me to give up on my first book, because I love it. I will always love it. But it definitely wasn't ready...
DeleteIt was nice to meet you too! I'll definitely hop on over and follow you :)
I read somewhere that the more rejections one has makes one yes all the more sweeter. I know that's easier said than lived but I agree with you, rejection simply means pushing on ahead with more hope, greater determination and committed passion.
ReplyDeleteToo true! I've never really been a quitter, and I don't intend on starting now :)
Deletethere is so much before I even come close to the dreaded horror of querying and such, which only makes me admire your courage all the more
ReplyDeleteAww, it's all just one crazy, daunting process, but it can be a lot of fun too! Just know that you're not alone :) Lots of people are/will be going through what you're going through!
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